- IC CONTACT POST FOR MASKORMENACE -

[slightlyoffchilt]

"Hello.

You've reached the direct line of Doctor Frederick Chilton. As I am not available at the moment, you might assume I'm quite busy with something pressing. State your name and business, and I will return your call."

Comments

[ferrisbuellean]

I can rely on you to keep your mouth shut, right? Otherwise I can and will hurt you.

[slightlyoffchilt]

The suspense is hurtful enough, Jeff. What is the circumstance?

[ferrisbuellean]

[Several loooong minutes go by. Texting might be an acceptable method to talk about personal stuff, he figures. At least it's not face to face.]

Ok fine, wise guy.

So I lied about not seeing a therapist. Obviously I saw one back home. Few years back I get put on anti-anxieties and some things happen. Some things that involve me losing all self-doubt and kinda getting a little full of myself. Like... Ego rampage. I trashed a kids party. And this place has decided, in it's infinite wisdom, to bring that back and I just wanna find out how easy this thing is gonna be to trigger and whether I need to be seriously concerned or not.

Satisfied?

[slightlyoffchilt]

A kid's party. Birthday party? Bar mitzvah? Was it because the child's celebration was not about you?

[You can bet he finds that anecdote hilarious. Moreover, mentions of egocentric violence is like blood in the water to the man.]

I can write you a limited prescription. But I will insist on at least monthly sessions for any additional medication.

[ferrisbuellean]

Bar mitzvah. They were giving out awards. I didn't win one.

[The kid who had the bar mitzvah won them all because, y'know, it was his friggin party. Jeff has issues, he knows this.]

The limited will do. I just need to know what I'm dealing with. There's no way I'm staying on them when they make it a hundred times worse.

[slightlyoffchilt]

["Oh my god," said Chilton, because he wouldn't type that out. This was absolutely delightful.]

You know that there isn't any medication to treat Narcissistic Personality Disorder, which you probably do have a non-malignant version of. Just based on our interactions. However, given the episode you described, I think there is an emotional behavioral conflict that can be mitigated.

[So where was all that ethical concern, moments ago? EVAPORATED! Especially now that Chilton realized he could test for manic depression in Jeff through literally trial and error. Now here was his new dilemma: should he prescribe lithium or a benzodiazepine?

Swing by my office, when you get a chance.

[ferrisbuellean]

["Oh my God" is basically Jeff's reaction too, but not for the same reasoning. He may not have it often, but he's pretty sure this is what shame feels like. Maybe if he can just feel like this forever more than he'll never have a problem with his ego ever again.]

Really? I appreciate it. I'm not being a guinea pig though.

[Oh Chilton, so kind and not at all just out for your own interests.]

[slightlyoffchilt]

Jeff, Jeff. I would never consider you a guinea pig. You are, if anything, my friend.

[Chilton is like the worst person, and he definitely believes that Jeff qualifies for BOTH of the above.]

Quick question: do you have any known allergies to specific chemical compounds? And do your powers include any healing factor?

[ferrisbuellean]

No known allergies but come to think of it I do have some adaptive power thing. Might mean stronger doses? Idk, seems harder to get drunk these days.

[It's a good thing Jeff is used to having 'friends' who are the worst of people. He mostly just comes to expect manipulation and back stabbing after years in law firms.]

[slightlyoffchilt]

Power adaptive thing. Describe that for me in quantitative form: how easy was it to get drunk before you acquired that power, and how difficult is it now?

Because maybe I shouldn't limit this to one medication.

[ferrisbuellean]

Probably double. I mean, I thought the alcohol around here was just weaksauce at first but come to think of it... probably was me.

We're still just talking about these anti-anxiety things right?

[slightlyoffchilt]

That would explain maxing out the tab cap, wouldn't it?

You're concerned about suffering another one of these episodes, aren't you? You want to be in control of yourself?

[ferrisbuellean]

Good thing you had a cap, huh?

Look, I control everything. There's no way I'm gonna let my ego try and take that away from me. Once I test out the limits with those meds, I need something that'll keep it at bay. I might also need a locked room after those anti-anxieties cause things could get ugly.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Upon our first meeting, at the bar. Unless this is a different power set? [NO ONE TOLD CHILTON THAT JEFF HAD LEFT.] Am I to understand this is a newer concern?

A locked room? I can provide that.

[ferrisbuellean]

New thing. Happened once back home though.

Ok, so we got the locked room covered. For science. You think you can get something that'll keep it at bay after that?

[slightlyoffchilt]

I have no doubt that science will ultimately help you restrain yourself, Jeff. No doubt at all.

[ferrisbuellean]

Yeah. Ok. I appreciate the help, Doc. I figure after a few montages I'll be able to find a way to control it without worrying about an episode after a few flattering glances from strangers. We got this.

[slightlyoffchilt]

When would be a good time for you? I imagine you don't want to start medication without a professional observing you, first.

I'm ignoring the television metaphors.

[ferrisbuellean]

I gotta work around my show, but I'm thinking the sooner the better. Maybe the next week or so?

[slightlyoffchilt]

Surely you aren't filming on a weekend? I can arrange a meeting with you then.

How is the show going, if I may?

[ferrisbuellean]

It's going. I mean it's not a total failure and I look amazing on camera, so yeah. Anyway weekend works. I can do weekend. Here I thought you'd be far too busy for me.

[slightlyoffchilt]

You suspected that I wouldn't make time for a dear friend? I'm wounded, Jeff.

[ferrisbuellean]

Well I wasn't sure if a man of my obvious perfection was going to be interesting enough for you.

[Still stings being palmed off to Crane like that, bro, still stings. His ego is fragile.]

[slightlyoffchilt]

You're resentful. Angry. Have I hurt your feelings, Jeff?

Such was surely not my intention.

[ferrisbuellean]

Nope. Not even bothered. You can make it up to me anyway.