- IC CONTACT POST FOR MASKORMENACE -

[slightlyoffchilt]

"Hello.

You've reached the direct line of Doctor Frederick Chilton. As I am not available at the moment, you might assume I'm quite busy with something pressing. State your name and business, and I will return your call."

Comments

[textualhealing]

Professional? When have you ever managed that, Chilts?

[slightlyoffchilt]

Oh I would be more than willing to show you how professional I can be.

[textualhealing]

Challenge accepted. You give me a regular time slot and act as professional as you can. I just... do my thing.

[And probably try to make it as unprofessional as possible just by existing.]

[slightlyoffchilt]

Tuesday afternoons? Mondays? What is your work schedule, anyway.

[textualhealing]

Normal office hours, but I can spare a few for you, Chilts. You gonna keep asking me how things make me feel?

[slightlyoffchilt]

How emotional events make you feel. Not physical objects. To clarify.

[textualhealing]

I can already answer that: They don't. I'm dead inside.

[slightlyoffchilt]

I will inevitably be the judge of that.

Can't wait.

[textualhealing]

Whatever. Just give me whatever time slot and I'll show up to this bull crap.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Mondays at five. That shouldn't be too unpleasant.

[textualhealing]

Mondays it is. You're still coming over tonight, right?

[slightlyoffchilt]

I certainly don't have any other plans. Will you keep the raccoon infestation away?

[textualhealing]

Eduardo and I kinda got a thing going on, so maybe I can ask him nice. But that might just mean they focus on you even more. You know how it is with raccoons; you tell them not to push the big red button, they're gonna push it.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Children. I believe you are thinking of children.

And possibly defense lawyers.

[textualhealing]

And raccoons. I mean defense lawyers and raccoons do share some similarities tho. Probably why we all get on.

[slightlyoffchilt]

I stand by kudu, for you. But if you would rather take the parallel of a raccoon, I will not stand in the way of your identity.

[textualhealing]

Only the easy living, free spirited ones. Not the rifling through trash kind.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Why deny part of yourself like this, Jeff? It will only hurt more in the long run.

And consequentially, it will run up my professional price.

[textualhealing]

No freebies? So much for mates rates.

[slightlyoffchilt]

We never really decided what benefits that "with benefits" would cover, did we?