- IC CONTACT POST FOR MASKORMENACE -

[slightlyoffchilt]

"Hello.

You've reached the direct line of Doctor Frederick Chilton. As I am not available at the moment, you might assume I'm quite busy with something pressing. State your name and business, and I will return your call."

Comments

text;

[slightlyoffchilt]

[Wow. Wow, Jeff.]

We opted for a more honest and open transparency between additional lovers. Whatever you do to her, you've got to do to me.

Otherwise: no.

[ferrisbuellean]

[It's important to get straight to the point.]

You're seriously saying that if I screw your gf I have to screw you?

[slightlyoffchilt]

I guess you're not engaging my girlfriend in explicitly sexual activities, then. I'll draw the line there -- if she kisses you, just remind her to use mouthwash afterwards. No need to mirror that endeavor.

[ferrisbuellean]

But if it is sexual then you want a piece of the Winger action too?

[slightlyoffchilt]

Let's not misconstrue my intent of equality. Those are the terms, Jeff, so take them as you will.

[ferrisbuellean]

But I really wanna bang her and I really don't wanna bang you. Are you sure I can't get with her and just find you some attractive rent boy who shares similar physical qualities to myself?

[slightlyoffchilt]

I really don't want to bang you either, but such is life. I'm sure you'll find some alternative way to foster personal relief.

[ferrisbuellean]

Man, I wish she'd just cheat on you like normal women do.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Raina is superior to your typical normal woman. That's why she and I are together.

This ought to be expected.

[ferrisbuellean]

Superiority complex, much?

[slightlyoffchilt]

I'll be sure to consider your snide criticism when I'm engaging Raina, my girlfriend. Sexually.

[ferrisbuellean]

Yeah, you do that. Think about me while banging your lady. Because that's not weird.

Now I'm just gonna feel like all our meetings are just an excuse for you to load up the spank bank imagery.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Don't flatter yourself. Thinking about your humiliation is not the same as thinking about you.

Unless, of course, your identity begins to adapt to a series of humiliating defeats and that isolating cyst is absorbed into your daily persona. Then that would merit concern, yes.

[ferrisbuellean]

Why am I not surprised that you get off on humiliation? It's ok to admit I'm the face you put behind it, I know I'm irresistable.

[slightlyoffchilt]

You're rather insistent on that. Do you want to be the face? It does, I suppose, proliferate your brand name.

[ferrisbuellean]

And what brand name would that be? Hottest guy on the planet?

[slightlyoffchilt]

Are you feeling insecure? Oh, Jeff. I can accommodate your validation needs when we're on the clock.

[ferrisbuellean]

Cmon Frederick, you know I don't have any insecurities.

[Except all of them.]

All I was after is an evening with your lady, but if that's off the cards, then I guess I'll just settle for tongue wrestling.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Maybe you'll be able to taste the after effects of her boyfriend, too.

[ferrisbuellean]

Oh, ew, gross. Too far, F.

[slightlyoffchilt]

You're the one pursuing a taken woman for, apparently, the attention of her boyfriend. That's the framework.

[ferrisbuellean]

Don't flatter yourself. I'm persuing her because she's hot and she keeps coming onto me.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Honestly, Jeff, I thought you were smarter than to fall for her more blatant manipulation. I mean, you at least don't go around calling yourself Star-Lord. I stand corrected.

[ferrisbuellean]

It's not really manipulations when I'm getting something out of it too. It's more like mutual exploitation. Pretty much what you and I have going, except I don't wanna sleep with you.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Useful to know. I feel exactly the same way -- as in, I don't want to sleep with you. It's a pretty predictable scenario, isn't it? Almost like I anticipated your reaction and used it in this dilemma.

Like you said: exploitation. Except without the mutual part, what are you getting out of this again?