- IC CONTACT POST FOR MASKORMENACE -

[slightlyoffchilt]

"Hello.

You've reached the direct line of Doctor Frederick Chilton. As I am not available at the moment, you might assume I'm quite busy with something pressing. State your name and business, and I will return your call."

Comments

[slightlyoffchilt]

Not sure if I believe you. [Apparently Chilton's textual impression of Will involves dropping a lot of the identity indicators -- like "I'm".]

Did you hear that?

[textualhealing]

[Flawless.]

What?

[slightlyoffchilt]

See? Not being loud after all.

[textualhealing]

Bullshit. I'm not even at home, moron. I'm not gonna argue about your loudness. All I'm trying to say is congrats but also keep it down. Next time I'll be banging on the door for you to stfu. Or joining you.

[slightlyoffchilt]

The invitation is always open.

[It was difficult to be tacit about this -- Chilton ached to say more. But he knew Will wouldn't.]

[textualhealing]

Yeah well I still don't think I'm ready for that step in our friendship, buddy. Not sure April is either.

[slightlyoffchilt]

We don't have to tell her.

[textualhealing]

True. And even with her surprise we can be safe in the knowledge that no one is ever gonna get as shit at threesomes as Chilton.

[slightlyoffchilt]

You would favor the twinks.

[textualhealing]

Yeah, nice try, Chilts, you deceitful little bastard. I'll admit, you had me going there at first.

[slightlyoffchilt]

It's only right that I have some fun since you had inflicted the image of Will and April and their noisy sex upon me.

[textualhealing]

Not my fault the phones are the fritz. They do have some seriously loud sex tho. Not sure if either of them sleep sometimes.

[slightlyoffchilt]

I don't want to continue to know the details, Jeff.

But -- yes, the communicators. I've had issues, too. Notably with one of Raina's assistants.

[textualhealing]

Deets and I won't continue to discuss the sex in this household.

[slightlyoffchilt]

I thought she was Raina, and I thought we were discussing a perfectly normal evening ahead.

That's as far as it went.

[textualhealing]

Lame. Perfectly normal for you is like what? Seducing random people into your household?

[slightlyoffchilt]

Give yourself more credit than that, Jeff. I doubt Raina considered you to be random.

[textualhealing]

You think she considered me your handsome suitor, right? I'm pretty sure she just had the hots for me.

[slightlyoffchilt]

She didn't choose you for her benefit.

[textualhealing]

Sure she didn't. So you really think she just did it for you?
Was it for you?
It's ok. I'm used to guy friends having crushes on me.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Don't make this uncomfortable. It was just a miscommunication.

[textualhealing]

It's not uncomfortable for me.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Oh, it's never uncomfortable for you, is it? The only proof I have that you can even feel discomfort is the fact that you live with Will and April.

[textualhealing]

And even then I spend half my time congratulating them about their sexcapades while simultaneously dealing with Sharkbait humping my leg. Me and discomfort don't really see eye to eye.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Personally I blame your incessant need for stimulation. Of any kind. But mainly attention.